The shoe I never thought I needed


This is the story about a pair of shoes I couldn’t afford to buy. They just so happened to catch my eye on a cold rainy Saturday right after payday, a time when every man and his dog feels like a king for a weekend, so I yolo’d and bought them.

They’re the Adidas Gazelle platform sneakers in grey. Lovely, right? But after I got them, and subsequently as soon as I arrived home, I questioned my decision to buy them several times over. I’ve never been one to irresponsibly spend my money, especially at a time when I didn’t know how much I could actually afford to spend. But for the next 3 weeks I quivered and hunched in fear that if i dare wear those shoes i might end up a broke bitch come the end of the month. So the beautiful blue Adidas shoebox sat aside my bed for ages. And each day i opened it up to look at the shoes like I had found gold in a treasure box and I was hiding it from the rest of the world.

A week or so later, while having lunch with my creative director, I decided to confide in him my irrational decision to buy said sneakers. It all came out in one long breath, “I couldn’t actually stop myself It was like an adrenaline rush like leaping off a cliff into the ocean I know ill survive but it wasn’t necessarily a thought-through decision and it’s eating me up inside (deep breath) now I can’t even bring myself to wear them in case I have to return them later this month!” I was all messed up over a pair of expensive sneakers.

But then I got dished the good stuff. Ah-Ha! It was so simple, I don’t know why I never saw it before. In response, my creative director said to me, “Wear the shoes. More money will come.” And he was so right! This isn’t to say that I condone impulsive shopping or, *shudder*, mindless consumerism. But sometimes it’s these kind of splurges that make you feel powerful and in control of your life, especially when you’re working hard to earn your money. Treat Yo Self, you know what I mean! There’s definitely some form of liberation that happens when you buy something you thought you would never be able to afford on your own.

So getting those shoes taught me that my weird spending habits aren’t bad ones, it’s good to question your preference (Do I actually need/like/want this?) and not to fill your wardrobe with things you might only wear a couple of times for a season and forget about it the next. Most of all though I learnt that ‘more money will come’. And so what if I was eating bulk pasta for a few weeks in order to make it through the month. I finally wore my beloved sneakers and to be honest, it felt good. They were one of the best things I’ve ever bought because of the circumstances.

So that’s that — things I learned from a pair of shoes I never thought I needed. I’ll leave you with the wise words of Queen B, “I’m a grown woman, I can do whatever I want“, because it’s true.

– Ashleigh


Why it’s OK to not always look your best


As I fathom the idea of this story in my head, I notice a spec of butternut soup on my white blouse, just above my boob. Fucking hell! There are two more specs on my lap and I shun the bowl, scraped clean by my spoon, as I go to grab a paper towel to clean myself off. Well, this is perfect actually, rather fitting because I now have to spend the rest of my day looking like I may or may not have fed a baby some butternut this morning. This brings me to think of how selfless moms are, but I stop right there and get back to the point. Before I can consider changing my top, or at least letting my hair down and swipe red lipstick across my mouth to distract passers by, I think to myself, you can do this. Do it for the story! Today I do not look my best.

More often than we’d like to admit, we all have our off days. And the days when we’re trying to make more of an effort to look exceptionally creative and unique in our outfits are the ones we may come to regret. Sometimes its just too damn hot to wear the shoes that would go perfectly with that dress because the shoes are lined with fur or have a 3 inch heel and that’s just not practical for the busy day ahead.
Trying to find an outfit suited to Cape Town weather is a struggle all on it’s own. When I got out the shower this morning and checked my trusty weather app it said it’d be 26 degrees today. I thought that was hot and my boyfriend and I bantered for a while when he opted to wear longs and I threw on a pair of shorts. He said, “26 is cool”, to which I made my rebuttal, “I’m already sweating! 26 is not cool, it’s hot!” this went on for a while and it turns out that by noon there were clouds and I was miserable and by 4 the sun was out and I was eating soup!

So, sometimes it is OK not to always look your rocking best. It only means that you’re closer to figuring out your personal style. And while my outfit preference changes as often as my nail polish colour I love finding the similarities in it all. Getting creative with your clothing is all part of the fun, right? And if all else fails, ask ‘What would Winona do in this situation?